People often comment that I have much in common with the Prince of Wales. We are both into agricultural reform, for one.
But few people know that we also shared a lover. Oh, yes. Muggins Mugabe here was seduced by Diana, Princess of Wales back in 1993 when she came to visit my country. Modesty forbids me from divulging the details of our affair, but let me say this: she was rubbish. If that’s good oral, then I’m not a Knight Commander of the Order of the Bath.
What Will Carling, James Hewitt or the Wigan rugby league team saw in her I’ll never know.